There's Power In This Focus

Written by Dave Pughe-Parry Dave Pughe-Parry

Last Updated: 18 January 2019 18 January 2019

One of the most common and tragic of the consequences of untreated ADHD is low self esteem. Despite evidence to the contrary, we believe - passionately - that we are useless, unworthy, and stupid.

In treating ADHD it is therefore absolutely vital to focus on the strengths, not on the weaknesses of the ADDer. You are just reinforcing the myth that we are useless, stupid and unworthy.

I once had a client who told me repeatedly that there wasn't  a single thing she liked about her daughter, despite plenty of evidence to the contrary. This child is a high achiever in many areas, but she had a few serious problems like all ADDers.

This became a serious stumbling block to successful coaching. There was simply nothing to build on, nothing on which we could launch the family into a successful future.

That old truth saying is important, "if you tell someone they are stupid, they will believe you and be stupid!"

The opposite is just as true. If you tell someone they are bright and capable, they will believe you. Just don't tell white-lies when doing this. If the person is not genius, don't tell them they are. They won't believe you when they fail to live up to your well meant fiction.

There is another truth saying that says, "nothing succeeds like success." The more you succeed, the more you are likely to succeed. Succeeding, just like winning becomes a habit.

Achieving and succeeding in one area of your life quickly spreads to other areas. Succeeding in managing your time effectively leads to being more productive in all areas of life. Managing your time successfuly starts with some success in planning and setting goals.

It is fundamental when treating ADHD to arm yourself with positives. Start in the light and then venture into the dark to conquer the weaknesses.

The future light at the end of the tunnel becomes very bright when focusing on existing strengths.

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